I don't do well with deadlines, even when I've personally set them. "I love deadlines. They make a beautiful woosh as they fly by!" I have been toying with ideas of what I want to write about. I thought about writing my reactions to what a visiting pastor shared at our service Sunday. He talked about how our potential for growth requires being connected into community. Then I was on the subject of priorities and how they are demonstrated. I had gotten so adamant about it that the only appropriate outlet I had was to write in my journal about it. I have also played with the idea of discussing transparency. For some reason I'd begun thinking I may be able to work the three together - community, priorities, and transparency. I'm not sure I want to do that, though. It would either be a shallow scrape across the top of three very important topics or it will be a very long entry. I will put the subjects of transparency and priorities as some other entries.
Pastor David Hertweck basically broke the topic of growth requiring community into two points but I'm going to focus on just his first one. His first point was about the things and beliefs that can have a way of breaking down someone's sense of community. In a community, people are known to each other.
Technology has created a false sense of connection together that honestly, just isn't enough for a person's emotional health. Social media is slowly replacing actual physical interaction between people. Facebook is estimated to have over a billion active users. If it were an actual country, it would be third in population - behind only India and China. People on social media only show what they want others to know about them. It becomes more and more difficult for good social interactive training. Social media doesn't encourage us to try to work things out. All a person has to do is 'unfriend' or 'unfollow' another person who is difficult to communicate with. The problem is "solved."
But physical closeness isn't connection either. A couple doing something together is not the same thing as two people participating in the same activity at the same time. Riding the same bus, at the same time, to the same stop didn't create the connection I had with a few people several years ago. We needed to be "built together" over time and through the conversations we had.
We need to connect with one another and work on keeping those connections. Connecting with someone else is risky. When we connect together, we begin to show our "less than" moments - thin spots in our emotional armor, vulnerabilities are exposed. Relationships can be messy. Interactions can become painful. We will find other people can prove to be rather inconvenient. Connecting with someone also means we learn about the weak spots the other person has, too. The good thing about making these links is that we become joyful when our friend has a triumph and we celebrate together. But also, we feel pain when our friends face a defeat. The connection joins us together in mourning.
I have been realizing over the last couple of weeks just how disconnected I have become. I'm not sure if it is my doing - a result of my pulling away - or if they have pulled back from me. That is an evaluation I will have to make. If they are responsible, I will give them what they wish and exit their lives. If I am responsible, I will work to fix it. Either way, though, I need to work building new connections. Others deserve the privilege of getting to know the real me!
Let's have tea together some time!
